When We De-Cluttered
Ax and I spent the last three days in major purge mode. We — rather, I, with permission — took all his toys and games out of his room and piled them in the multi-purpose/no purpose spare room in a heap. Then, the next day, after some perfectionist recidivism (mine) in the form of soul-searching and Internet-searching re: optimal closet storage solutions, Ax, Mike, and I took the camper to Home Depot and got the least-expensive, least labor-intensive in-closet shelving possible. We brought it home and assembled it, the three of us, with no actual bloodshed or tears.
After assembling the first of the two shelving “units” I’ll admit I think I said something to Mike like, “This is the worst shelving ever made and our child will have no habitable planet because we keep buying melamine-coated particleboard crap!”
It was about 100 degrees in Ax’s room even with the fan on and did I mention we’d been to the Container Store and Target before Home Depot and while I’d stopped for more caffeine there’d been no snack break. And it was past dinner time. And hot. And.
“Why are you just standing there like that?” I yelled at Mike, who was, truly, just standing there, electric screwdriver in hand. “Are we going to put together the second one or return it?” I asked him.
A beat. “I don’t know.”
Me: Fshhhhhhumpf.
Mike: “If it were up to me I’d just build it and get it done but I’m trying to gauge how you’re going to feel.”
“Fine. Let’s do it,” I said, and we cracked open the second box, got to hands and knees assembling on the floor, aware our son was watching us like a show. A suspenseful show.
Mike and I were kinda in the zone as we get when it’s getterdone time, which is not entirely pleasant but not unpleasant either. Quite. Focused.
Ax: “Can I help?”
Me: “Let Dad do this part and then you can help.”
Mike: “Buddy, hold these nails for me.”
Me: “Your dad is a really good builder.”
Ax: “I know!” Standing near his dad, little hand clutching nails.
Then I remembered it’s the journey and went and got us some “paleo cookies” the On It mom brought us last week and put the Grateful Dead on Spotify, while Mike and his assistant wrestled with the particleboard.
Then I got a second hammer and Mike and I sprinted to the finish, each of us calling for nails one at a time from Ax. I only hit the edge of my thumbnail once and it didn’t hurt that much. We all kept going.
When we completed the build we tipped the unit up and Ax said, “Looks good!”
It was still one of the cheapest, most disposable pieces of furniture ever created. The plastic coating was already ripping on one side. It represented a kind of disposable, hoarder-type, acquisitive, taste-free, materialistic lifestyle that violated some of my deepest values and aspirations.
“It does look good, doesn’t it?” I said.
We placed the second shelf in the closet together, Mike and I, and I pushed it around closer to the wall vs. closer to the other shelf.
“I’d lean them together for stability,” Mike said, and I did what he recommended without debating. We smiled at each other. We make a good team. A little nuts, but good.
Who squeezes in a re-do of their 6-year-old’s room in a day, while trying to be conscious parents, during a huge heatwave, after two days of Dead shows, a potential fire evac, and just before driving 3+ hours to work? We do. And we did it.
“Ax, how are you feeling?” Mike said.
“Pretty good,” Ax said, which are the words he always uses but can mean pretty good/super-stoked or pretty good/kinda-sad and everything in between.
“You like your new room?” Mike asked.
“Yeah!” Ax said, and did some kind of karate dance kick move in the space on his floor where once there was clutter.
“You know we love you and that’s why we did all this today because we love you and we want you to have space for your things.”
“I know,” Ax said.
And today, while Mike was at work, Ax and I continued the process. We started at 8 this morning and worked straight through to 4, with a quick lunch break.
The piles in the spare room got sorted. Things Ax wanted to keep he marched back into his room and placed on the new shelves.
Everything else we took to the resale shop. Ax netted $18, plus three new-to-him pieces of plastic including some kind of green nerf cross-bow as well as a rubber slingshot.
I’m gonna keep going. www.livingeveryminuteofit.com