Yoga Teacher Training Week 6: Effort + Time = Something

Oh man, I remember having Big Deep Thoughts to share yesterday.  But I don’t remember what they were.   You know all of it anyway.  Patience, tolerance, kindness, love, for myself and others.  Veer towards truth.  Get over myself, again and again and again.  Never underestimate the power of a wordless hug. 

I like Big Deep Thoughts.  I like Revelations and Awakenings and Radical New Initiatives.  Like I like spicy food and flashy clothes and shiny cars.  Wheeee!

Thing is, it seems like the universe, Gd, whatever you want to call it, favors incremental baby steps, over time.  Slogging through the pain — and it is painful — of letting go of all my ideas about how things should be, how I should, could, would be if only.  How others might be.  

And then into the reality of what is.  Working with what is, incrementally.  And that hideously slow trudge.  Through everything.  Pellets and sticks along the way.

It’s not been a skipping through the daisies.  It’s been fending off rabid dragons with a twig while teetering on a cliff edge in the rain.  And then one day the dragons became bunnies, and then lint, and then nothing.  

And the rain stopped and the bright green field of white daisies in front of me bloomed and I stepped right into it, knowing it’s not permanent either, knowing I will see dragons again, knowing it will rain again, but able to feel the sun right now.  Enjoying the green grass right now.  Oh man it feels good.  

This week I’m feeling like one of those overnight successes, twenty years, thirty years, in the making.  Effort + Time = Something.  

It’s wonderful.  I’m gonna keep going.