A Free Total Makeover

Some days I just get so busy with stuff, stuff that seems so very much like life that I don’t even notice that I’m not bringing hardly any consciousness or intention to any of it at all.   Like I’m living my life right. now.  And writing that forces me to double-take, reassess, pause and notice how I’m spending my time, who I’m spending it with, what I’m spending it on, which direction I’m headed into.  How’s it all working for me?

Like lately I’ve been thinking a lot about clutter.  Also sectionals, and, to be totally honest, how to completely remodel our entire home for no money and no disruption.  

These thoughts are what I call “obvious distractions.”  They’re obvious because I already have been through the whole sectional lust/rethink/reject drama and I know where this ends.  No new sectional.  

Same with clutter.  Somehow, some way, we have managed to live, pretty well, in our — yes — cluttered — home.  We manage to jettison whatever needs jettisoning in time for new to come in, new space needs to be met.

So one option would be to take de-cluttering off the to-do list.  Permanently.  We are not, and have never been, in any real danger of being buried alive in books, LEGO, or pilling black leggings.  

Nor has anyone actually threatened to vote us off the island, banish us from the kingdom, or reject us from the herd due to omnipresent clutter, grey-ing dish towels, and weirdly self-replicating clean-yet-unfolded piles of laundry.

So done and done.  No more sectional talk, no more de-clutter ambition.  

But what about the “gut reno” — the wrecking ball the whole place fantasy and rebuild a Zen Princess Palace with white cashmere  and silk everything, with a few hits of fluffy and sparkly, yet fair trade, eco-friendly and/or up-cycled and/or socially-entrepreneurially-crafted, and/or locally-sourced accent items.  Sigh.

Ok, so what is that?  That is what what I want to feel like looks like, as best I can describe it, for now.  Me likey.  But the truth is, getting that look would not get me the feel.  I can get the feel without the wrecking ball.  

Close my eyes, breathe, breathe more, there it is.  My free and easy total remodel.  I’m gonna keep going.