What Am I Trying to Achieve?
I got really twisted up yesterday about Ax’s food life, which continues to focus on carbs, chocolate, and marinara sauce. Specifically, I was trying to “work with” my husband to “co-create” a plan to improve Ax’s nutrition. Ultimately, as the parent on the ground day-to-day, I would be implementing any such plan, so right there the “co-creating” thing irked me from the get-go. But I also wanted help, and I begged Mike for help. But I also felt desperate, anxious, hopeless, and a tad angry. So Mike was, reasonably, leery of weighing in. Which also pissed me off.
“One option,” Mike said tentatively, “is we could take Ax to the grocery store and let him pick out healthy foods he’d like to try, then we can remind him that he picked them out.”
“We’ve done that,” I snapped, “and I wind up with drawers full of coconut chips and stuff he won’t eat.”
“Ok,” Mike said, “What do you want to do?”
“I just want to know, are we getting orange juice or not?!?”
“Well, there’s a spectrum of sugar,” Mike began, waving his hands around to show the “spectrum.”
“On one end of the spectrum is chocolate and ice cream and on the other is kale. I think orange juice is somewhere in the middle.”
“Aaaaaarghhhhh!” I said, “Yes or no, Mike? Juice/No juice? Please!!!!!!”
“You have to look at it from the macro perspective of his whole diet, like if there’s more sugar in one area there should be less in another area.”
And right then, I’ll admit, I wanted to strangle my husband, who I love dearly and am grateful for every day and is my soulmate, but really — the “full spectrum macro perspective” was not what I wanted. I wanted someone to Tell Me What To Do About Breakfast. And lunch, and snack, and dinner.
But, of course, as the parent on the ground day-to-day, I do have the information about what’s gonna fly and what’s not. And Mike knew he was in hostile territory with his emotionally hijacked beloved (me). Eventually, I made the call: No juice (except when there is juice) and no radical new food initiatives.
Our son is healthy. Our son is generally happy. Our son seems to be a pretty typical seven-year-old who could use a few more veggies in his diet, which we can continue to attempt to serve him. He’s a picky eater. It’s not a crisis.
Mike and I went shopping, we got a few veggies we know Ax sometimes will eat, and a couple of cool new eco-friendly containers for his lunches — which will mainly be tortellini marinara and a veg that will come home untouched, just like last year. And it will be okay. Just like last year.
I’m gonna keep going. www.livingeveryminuteofit.com
Ps. Sorry Mike, and thanks. And ... you’re welcome.