Happy Fathers’ Day
What would it take to have a truly happy Fathers’ Day? Meaning, what can I do to make life better for the daddies in my life, just for one day? For me it’s not going to be doing extra dishes or making a cake or perfecting my tennis game. Maybe they’d like that, but not really so much unless it was really really something I wanted to do.
I’m lucky that way. The daddies in my life, my father, my son’s father, aka: my husband, want me to be happy. And, what I’ve figured out is, like me, they want me to be happy with them, as they truly are, not as some fantasy version of manhood or fatherhood or good person-hood or good-husbandhood. And, like me, it’s scary for them, not normal for them, to be vulnerable enough to admit what that is, even today, on their day.
What would you like for fathers’ day? “Can we just relax and not do anything?” is Mike’s answer, which is code for let’s not have a party, let’s not you (me) get all excited about making a perfect something for dinner, let’s just enjoy being together, and perhaps let him take a guilt-free nap at some point. I can totally do that.
As for my father, he got what he needed from me already today. A FaceTime with his grandson and good luck wishes for his morning tennis match. I don’t have to play tennis if I don’t want to, as long as I can be happy he’s playing. And I can, and I am. So happy.
Love for the daddies! I’m gonna keep going.